![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
unknownseas regains!
Apr. 22nd, 2020 09:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
bogwife>Keep
Bootleg Bear Plush - A plush of some strange bear that’s black on its right side and white on its left, with one poorly-stitched red eye. Who is he? Why is he here? He has a terrible aura...
Ten-Gallon Hat - A hat perfect for wearing in a western - or on stage singing country music. Yeehaw!
Nisse - A stuffed friend for the holidays, or really any other time of the year - Gaze upon it, love it, take it home.
Velvet Cape - A full velvet cape, perfect for swishing around and pretending you’re either an old-timey aristocrat or a vampire. Also useful if you wanna get a LARP started in here.
Rations - A set of military rations. At least they’ll never go bad?
Life-Sized Stuffed Penguin - A stuffed penguin about a foot and a half tall. Looks almost real, but is almost unbelievably soft.
Box of Chocolates - Wow, it’s just like life! Careful not to grab the one that just kinda tastes like it’s full of shampoo.
Freeze-Dried Ice Cream - Pretend you’re an astronaut! Only available in vanilla, but there's an ad on the back for other flavors.
Pet Talking Skull - Though it may be shocking to get what looks like a human skull out of a vending machine, you're probably not prepared for it to be alive. It doesn't talk, but by the disgruntled sound of it's grunts and groans it seems as though it probably hates being alive. Enjoy your new pet! - Adopted from Rin
Cassandrium - A brand new element! Or- wait, this is just a chunk of shiny, purple glass! (Courtesy of a stranger)
Parkour 101 - A handbook on how to do all kinds of sick jumps and flips and things that cool kids did in whatever year it was when parkour was hilariously big. Would probably be more useful outside of your current environment.
Blobfish Kigurumi - No one asked for this. No one needed to bring this into the world.
Coconut - It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you while trapped at the bottom of the sea, but it refuses to complain…'
Shovel - A normal shovel. For digging. You know, with all the dirt you have access to.
Pin-Up Calendar? - A calendar for the year 2015, featuring lurid pictures of… wait, no, those are just normal janitors in full coveralls standing in exotic locations.
Toy Laser Sword - A toy sword handle with a collapsible blade in one of several different colors! This one is purple. Not affiliated with any existing multimedia franchise.
A Cool Refreshing Beverage - Nice!
Mountain Dew Red - Wasn't this discontinued? Where did this come from, the back room of Spencer's? (Courtesy of a stranger)
Freebie
Donut - These donuts are great! Jelly-filled are my favorite! Which is to say yes, this is a single jelly-filled donut. It doesn’t even look suspiciously like any other kind of food.
The Dreaded Knarrevik - An IKEA-branded nightstand! Comes unassembled in-box with the instructions missing. Good luck!
Matryoshka Dolls - A series of intricately painted nesting dolls, meant for display rather than as a toy for children. At the center there’s… a stick of gum?
Wizard Hat - A big pointy blue and silver hat! For commanding mystical energies, or maybe just looking like a dork.
An Egg - Can the vending machine offer you one of these in this trying time? Hard-boiled, at least.
9999 in 1 Game Device - A handheld device for playing retro games! There’s actually only about twenty, they just repeat in the menu until they reach 9999. Also they all suck.
Velvet Cape - A full velvet cape, perfect for swishing around and pretending you’re either an old-timey aristocrat or a vampire. Also useful if you wanna get a LARP started in here.
Black Lotuss - Oh man, this is like the most expensive trading card in the… hang on now, it’s counterfeit! What a ripoff!
A Gallon of Seawater - Literally just some seawater spills out onto the floor from the mouth of the vending machine. Why this?
Rations - A set of military rations. At least they’ll never go bad?
Hot Sauce - A bottle of very strong hot sauce! Use at your own risk!
Parkour 101 - A handbook on how to do all kinds of sick jumps and flips and things that cool kids did in whatever year it was when parkour was hilariously big. Would probably be more useful outside of your current environment.
Velvet Cape - A full velvet cape, perfect for swishing around and pretending you’re either an old-timey aristocrat or a vampire. Also useful if you wanna get a LARP started in here.
“Personal Space Reminder” - A small handheld device that, when you press a button, generates an external current of electricity. Could be dangerous if you touched someone with the electric parts!
Belongs to Someone Else
Chess set - A chessboard with golden pieces in unusual and varying shapes.
Prom Dress - A black, slinky velvet dress with triangular cutouts. Perfect for letting glittery skin show through!
Thief's Tools - A set of picks and skeleton keys on an iron ring. A thief could count himself lucky to have such an extensive collection... if he lived in the Dark Ages. Returned to Therion
Teacher of the Year Plaque - It's a wooden plaque with a red apple on it, proclaiming someone named William Schuester the Teacher of the Year in 2012. Wow, he must be great! (Courtesy of a stranger)
Returned to Her
Princess - What even is this thing? It looks like some kind of terrible nude rabbit that’s also a giant mole. At least it’s docile, even wearing a dark pink leather collar with a copper metal nameplate with the words “Princess III” etched into it. - From Therion
Julius - Sweet Ancestors, that’s a big ugly lizard. It almost resembles a dragon if not for three things: 1) it’s around the size of a 15 lb dog, 2) it has no teeth despite looking like it should, and 3) it has a leather collar around its neck with a copper metal nameplate that just reads “Julius”. - From Jasper
Bootleg Bear Plush - A plush of some strange bear that’s black on its right side and white on its left, with one poorly-stitched red eye. Who is he? Why is he here? He has a terrible aura...
Ten-Gallon Hat - A hat perfect for wearing in a western - or on stage singing country music. Yeehaw!
Nisse - A stuffed friend for the holidays, or really any other time of the year - Gaze upon it, love it, take it home.
Velvet Cape - A full velvet cape, perfect for swishing around and pretending you’re either an old-timey aristocrat or a vampire. Also useful if you wanna get a LARP started in here.
Rations - A set of military rations. At least they’ll never go bad?
Life-Sized Stuffed Penguin - A stuffed penguin about a foot and a half tall. Looks almost real, but is almost unbelievably soft.
Box of Chocolates - Wow, it’s just like life! Careful not to grab the one that just kinda tastes like it’s full of shampoo.
Freeze-Dried Ice Cream - Pretend you’re an astronaut! Only available in vanilla, but there's an ad on the back for other flavors.
Pet Talking Skull - Though it may be shocking to get what looks like a human skull out of a vending machine, you're probably not prepared for it to be alive. It doesn't talk, but by the disgruntled sound of it's grunts and groans it seems as though it probably hates being alive. Enjoy your new pet! - Adopted from Rin
Cassandrium - A brand new element! Or- wait, this is just a chunk of shiny, purple glass! (Courtesy of a stranger)
Parkour 101 - A handbook on how to do all kinds of sick jumps and flips and things that cool kids did in whatever year it was when parkour was hilariously big. Would probably be more useful outside of your current environment.
Blobfish Kigurumi - No one asked for this. No one needed to bring this into the world.
Coconut - It’s a coconut. Secretly, as a food famous for floating, it’s suffering more than any of you while trapped at the bottom of the sea, but it refuses to complain…'
Shovel - A normal shovel. For digging. You know, with all the dirt you have access to.
Pin-Up Calendar? - A calendar for the year 2015, featuring lurid pictures of… wait, no, those are just normal janitors in full coveralls standing in exotic locations.
Toy Laser Sword - A toy sword handle with a collapsible blade in one of several different colors! This one is purple. Not affiliated with any existing multimedia franchise.
A Cool Refreshing Beverage - Nice!
Mountain Dew Red - Wasn't this discontinued? Where did this come from, the back room of Spencer's? (Courtesy of a stranger)
Freebie
Donut - These donuts are great! Jelly-filled are my favorite! Which is to say yes, this is a single jelly-filled donut. It doesn’t even look suspiciously like any other kind of food.
The Dreaded Knarrevik - An IKEA-branded nightstand! Comes unassembled in-box with the instructions missing. Good luck!
Matryoshka Dolls - A series of intricately painted nesting dolls, meant for display rather than as a toy for children. At the center there’s… a stick of gum?
Wizard Hat - A big pointy blue and silver hat! For commanding mystical energies, or maybe just looking like a dork.
An Egg - Can the vending machine offer you one of these in this trying time? Hard-boiled, at least.
9999 in 1 Game Device - A handheld device for playing retro games! There’s actually only about twenty, they just repeat in the menu until they reach 9999. Also they all suck.
Velvet Cape - A full velvet cape, perfect for swishing around and pretending you’re either an old-timey aristocrat or a vampire. Also useful if you wanna get a LARP started in here.
Black Lotuss - Oh man, this is like the most expensive trading card in the… hang on now, it’s counterfeit! What a ripoff!
A Gallon of Seawater - Literally just some seawater spills out onto the floor from the mouth of the vending machine. Why this?
Rations - A set of military rations. At least they’ll never go bad?
Hot Sauce - A bottle of very strong hot sauce! Use at your own risk!
Parkour 101 - A handbook on how to do all kinds of sick jumps and flips and things that cool kids did in whatever year it was when parkour was hilariously big. Would probably be more useful outside of your current environment.
Velvet Cape - A full velvet cape, perfect for swishing around and pretending you’re either an old-timey aristocrat or a vampire. Also useful if you wanna get a LARP started in here.
“Personal Space Reminder” - A small handheld device that, when you press a button, generates an external current of electricity. Could be dangerous if you touched someone with the electric parts!
Belongs to Someone Else
Chess set - A chessboard with golden pieces in unusual and varying shapes.
Prom Dress - A black, slinky velvet dress with triangular cutouts. Perfect for letting glittery skin show through!
Thief's Tools - A set of picks and skeleton keys on an iron ring. A thief could count himself lucky to have such an extensive collection... if he lived in the Dark Ages. Returned to Therion
Teacher of the Year Plaque - It's a wooden plaque with a red apple on it, proclaiming someone named William Schuester the Teacher of the Year in 2012. Wow, he must be great! (Courtesy of a stranger)
Returned to Her
Princess - What even is this thing? It looks like some kind of terrible nude rabbit that’s also a giant mole. At least it’s docile, even wearing a dark pink leather collar with a copper metal nameplate with the words “Princess III” etched into it. - From Therion
Julius - Sweet Ancestors, that’s a big ugly lizard. It almost resembles a dragon if not for three things: 1) it’s around the size of a 15 lb dog, 2) it has no teeth despite looking like it should, and 3) it has a leather collar around its neck with a copper metal nameplate that just reads “Julius”. - From Jasper
